My Thoughts

I, like many people, often wonder about the similarities I share with people—people who share in my profession, my economic bracket, my role as husband and father, my zip-code, my athletic abilities, my hobbies, and my god-given talents.

But, what could I learn and accomplish if I started looking at the world horizontally?.

What if instead of Googling the players in the world who share similar traits with me, I Googled a random name—a name like mine? What relevance do the other Todd Nordstroms bring to this world? What life-leadership advice can the Todd Nordstroms of the world bring to the table? What can a group of people who share nothing in common except a name accomplish if they combine strengths, talents, personal networks, and ideas?

I know. You’re thinking, “C’mon, Todd. This is a posting about all the Todd Nordstroms in the World? That’s a silly idea—a ridiculous concept.”

Maybe. But, I figured it was worth a shot. So, I found another Todd Nordstrom–a guy living on the opposite side of the country, working in different profession, and, still, making the world a better place. After all, isn’t that the one similarity we all should look to find–passion, that we can all make an impact?

I’ve always said that people who wake up every day and believe they can change the world, do. Check out my new friend…S. Todd Nordstrom here www.nordstromnetwork.com

Why ask why?

It seems absurd for me, a guy who questions everything, to pose such a question–but I can’t resist.  The other day, while gleefully consuming my lunch which consisted of fruit, nuts, a small serving of cheese, and fantastic can of Chicken of the Sea tuna, I was asked, “Why do you eat so healthy–you’re too skinny to be eating health food?”

Isn’t that like asking a wealthy person why they don’t spend all their money?  Isn’t that like asking a highly successful person why they spend so much time focused on their career endeavors?  And, wouldn’t that be like asking an athlete why they spend so much time worrying about physical conditioning?

If  you have something good–a great relationship, a great career, fantastic health, or tons of wealth–it’s most likely because you’ve focused your attention and your actions on that very aspect of your life.  And, if you’ve fallen into something bad, it’s most likely because you’ve lost that focus.

So, the next time you find yourself asking someone a ridiculous “why” question, pose a question to yourself, “why not?”

Today I stepped outside into typical Arizona sunshine and headed over to watch the runners in P.F. Chang’s Rock and Roll Marathon.

As a runner, and a marathoner, it’s not easy sitting on the side-lines. And, don’t get me wrong, I’m nowhere close to being considered competitive–it’s not like I’ll ever win a 26.2.  However, I’ve always perceived two types of people in this world–those who watch, and those who do.  Today, I was a “watcher.”  And, I didn’t like it.

But, my emotions and perceptions aside, I was reminded of conversation I had just weeks ago with a co-worker.

“Are you running the marathon?” the coworker asked.

“Not this one,” I replied.

The coworker added, “Uggh, I could never run a marathon.”  And then, they asked, “Why aren’t you running this one?”

“I haven’t trained for it,” I said.

That’s when I realized that both of us weren’t running for the exact same reason–neither of us had trained to run it.  The only reason anyone can run a marathon is because they train to run a marathon.  And, in fact, the same would hold true for most accomplishments in life–if we don’t do anything to prepare for an accomplishment, then we’ll never really accomplish anything.  And,  even worse,  we may even  believe that the accomplishment is impossible.  “I could never run a marathon.  I could never give up sweets.  I could never get rich at my job.  I could never run my own business. I could never change the world.”

Ironically the only thing that makes anything impossible is the belief that it is impossible.

It’s time for me to put my race shoes back on–cause I’m a lot more comfortable being one of those people who do, instead of one of those people who watch.

I’ve got a cool job.  I get to make friends with guys like Frank Maguire.  He’s one of those people who has created a legacy–he was a founding VP at Fed Ex, a VP under Colonel Sanders at KFC, a head of programming at ABC Radio Network, and he served as a communications consultant in the White House during the Kennedy and Johnson Administrations.  This guy has done it all.  And, I’m lucky enough to chit chat with him on a weakly basis–to shoot the breeze and toss around ideas.

C’mon, how cool is that?

Maguire said something to me a few weeks ago that really struck me today.  Frank said, “The worst thing you can do is underestimate someone’s ability–and that includes your own.”

When Frank said those words, I didn’t truly internalize his words.  I thought they were just a reference to the story he was sharing with me about how he almost got fired for giving an inexperienced broadcaster an opportunity in network news–a guy named Ted Kopel.

Anyway, I let Maguire’s words float in and out of my hallow head without even giving them a chance to bounce around–”I don’t underestimate people, and I surely don’t underestimate myself.”

But, do I?

My oldest daughter (6) has been fascinated by the fact that I’m a runner.  She asks me all the time, “Where do you go for so long?  Don’t you get bored?” And, then, last week she asked if she could go with me on run.

I agreed that I would take her jogging–maybe just a short run.  I figured that she might be able to run a half-mile tops.  And, it would be fun.

Today, as she was getting ready for “the big run” my 3 year-old watched.  “Daddy, I want to go running too.”

“Oh, I think you’re too little,” I said.

That’s when my wife gave me “the look”–the expression that somehow tumbles my gastrointestinal system into a scurry of fright, and powerfully transmits guilt like a dog whistle with a debilitating squelch.

Anyway, the girls and I headed out.  We weren’t more than 10 meters into the running path before my 3 year-old screamed with glee, “Run daddy run.  You can’t catch me!”  And, off she went.  Zoom!

Okay, so it’s not the fact that she was running that surprised me.  It’s not the fact that my 6 year-old bolted out 50 meters ahead of us.  And, it wasn’t the fact that they were both giggling like caged cats who had just been released in catnip field.  What shocked me is that they both just kept running…and running…and running.  At the half-mile mark, I got worried about taking them too far–and they both complained when I told them we had to turn around.

I had underestimated two of the people I know the best in life.  And, I had overestimated my ability to judge what my two little sweet peas can or cannot do–simply because they had never done it before.

As I dropped the girls back at the house with my wife, and headed back out for my own run, I wondered how much my own perceptions dictated how far I would run that day as well.  Would I turn around at a particular spot simply because it’s where I typically turn around?  Would feel fatigued at certain geographical markers simply because those are the spots I normally feel fatigue?

And, above all this, why do we all assume that we cannot accomplish those things we have never accomplished in the past?

Think like a child–they have no grasp of what is possible–so they simply put one foot in front of the other.  They may not care how far they will go. They may not care how fast they will go.  They may not even sense that at some point they’ll feel fatigued.  They just keep moving forward.

My life is busy—hectic. I have three young children. I am the Editor of fast-growing magazine. I also write books in my so-called “free time”. Sure, I get a little strung out sometimes. How else could I justify my bad haircuts?

Anyway, while working on a book (www.thecureforheartdisease.net) with Dr. Lundell, a world renowned heart surgeon, I realized the true meaning of perspective. Dr. Lundell and I would meet once a week to discuss the writing process. One morning our illustrator, Sarah, was joining us to discuss how the anatomical illustrations coincided with the text. That morning is still vivid in my memory. It was raining in Phoenix—not something Arizonans find typical. But, that wasn’t the only thing memorable. Dr. Lundell had his laptop open in the coffee shop, where he was showing me video of open-heart surgery.

Sarah called while we watched the video. She was in a panic because she was running late.

“Sarah’s running late,” I said when she called, still staring at the computer screen. “She’ll be here in about 5 or 10 minutes.”

Dr. Lundell didn’t flinch. “Okay,” he said, and continued to explain the circumstances of the patient in the video—chest pried wide open, heart beating, and scalpel looming.

That was the first time I had ever seen video of Dr. Lundell in action. That was the first time it occurred to me that I was sitting next to man who truly perceived his purpose—shouldering the expertise and responsibility of human life.

After a few minutes, Sarah came rushing through the door—her curly hair bouncing from side to side in a nervous scurry. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am,” she said, obviously out of breath. “I’m never late and I feel just horrible.”

“It’s okay,” said Dr. Lundell. “We’re not going anywhere.”

“I’m so, so, so, so sorry,” Sarah repeated, noticeably shaking with regret.

“Sarah,” said Dr. Lundell. “Calm down. Nobody is dying here.”

Nobody is dying? Typically, I would have passed that comment off as just an average play on words—a saying or a cliché that didn’t hold any weight. But, Dr. Lundell meant it. This is man who held the fate of more than 5,000 open-heart surgery patients in his own two hands. He was right. He had been the person whose presence was necessary to save lives. Sarah was just six minutes late to our meeting. We were discussing illustrations. Nobody’s life depended on her prompt arrival.

We all get wrapped up in the day-to-stress of expectations that don’t serve our purpose. And, if we get too entrenched in the stress of daily minutia, we can easily lose sight of the things that matter the most. This happens all the time. Parents perceive their purpose at work as the primary importance in their life and allow their children to suffer from their absence. Managers perceive their purpose as patrolling employees instead of helping those employees grow and prosper in their careers. Even vacationers can lose sight of the purpose of their vacation—allowing itineraries to become more important than rest and relaxation. Sadly, we often bury purpose before we ever get a chance to see what it truly is.

Bruce Lee used to say, “Sow down to move faster.”

I guess that means that instead of running through the woods with my hair on fire, screaming in panic, I should start jogging.

My daughter’s accordion-style closet door came off the hinges tonight, right before her bed time. I quickly noticed the problem, and realized that a simple fix could become a frustrating task. Fiddling with the stupid door was the last thing I wanted to do. But, as my daughter’s little blue eyes gazed upon me, I also realized that if I walked away and said, “I don’t want to deal with it right now,” that I would probably hear those exact same words out of her mouth next time I ask her to pick up her toys.

And, that’s when I realized I had a bad attitude. But, so what? Right?

I don’t watch TV often. However, I love the show, The Biggest Loser. No where else in American popular culture can you see the transformation of people to this extent. And, I’m not talking about just losing weight. I’m talking about attitude.

There’s a saying that has been repeated time and again, and passed amongst generations: “Attitude is everything.” I agree with that statement. However, I’ve always wondered how a person changes their attitude. It’s not like there’s a switch in your brain that you can manually pluck to turn-on the great attitude. “Yippie, I want to fix the stupid door right now.” It’d never happen.

But, this is where my favorite TV show comes into play. Watch The Biggest Loser. Pay attention to the attitudes of the people at the beginning of the show. Listen to their language. Watch their posture. And then, pay attention to their attitudes at the end of the show–it’s a completely amazing transformation.

But, here’s my question: Did the transformation happen because they made a choice to change their attitude? Or, did it happen because they chose to do something toward their goal no matter what their attitude was when they started the show?

I fixed the door–with a bad attitude. And then, something strange happened. I checked the doors of my other two kid’s closets too–to make sure they didn’t need to be fixed. I actually enjoyed the fact that I succeeded at doing something that I absolutely dreaded. It was fun!

Here’s the point.

Any goal can seem painful. And, I believe the only way to change your attitude about a seemingly painful process of reaching a goal is simply by taking the first step.

We are what we do.

Want proof? Give an attitude check to someone who talks about goals but never does anything to achieve them.

Everyone is a teacher.

Sitting comfortably in my favorite yellow chair, my three year-old approached me the other day.

“Daddy, why are you angry?”she asked.

“I’m not angry,” I responded.

“You’re not saying anything.” she said.

I chuckled.  “I guess I don’t always have something that needs to be said,” I replied.

She grinned.  “But, there’s always things you can do.”

I overheard a conversation the other day between two 20-something women in a coffee house.  One young woman was complaining to the other that she had not been given the advantages of some of her peers.

And, as much as advantages can be tools to help us all achieve, I couldn’t help but think she was a whiner.

Do we all spend too much time and energy focusing on things we don’t have that may or may not help us accomplish our ultimate goal?

Consider this:  NASA scientists spent a decade and about 12 billion dollars developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, and on almost any surface including glass.  When the Russians went to space, they used a pencil.

Different tools.  Same outcome.

Although, maybe the point of this post is that I should stop eves dropping on people’s conversations.

Everyone is talking about resolutions.  I read in the newspaper today that 60% of people who start a New Year’s resolution will give up on it within the first 6 months.  But, here’s the really disturbing thing that was written, “those who do set resolutions are 10 times as likely to be successful in ultimately reaching their goals than people who don’t set resolutions.”

If that sounds like some sort of mind-blowing statistic, read it again.  How can anyone find resolve in a resolution they haven’t made?

People, a resolution is nothing more than a statement of what we say we’ll do.  However, the only thing that matters is the “doing.”  Smokers smoke.  Runners run.  Painters paint. And, lovers love.

Who cares what you resolve to do?  Question is; what do you do?